Dear 20-year-old punk...
I have an investment opportunity for you. An opportunity other 20-something’s are passing up.
This investment can make you more money, get you a better job, land you a great relationship with a beautiful woman, and give you more self-confidence.
This investment is your appearance.
It might not seem like a big deal now at a young age, but it’s more meaningful now that it ever will be. If you know about compound interest, investing in anything early is much more profitable in the long run.
A lot of your peers aren’t taking their image seriously right now. They follow trends. They have a lazy sense of style, opting for what is comfortable instead of what is proper. To them, their twenties are a time where taking pride in their appearance isn’t necessary.
But you’re not like them. You care about your own development. You’re reading this blog. You’re on your way to becoming a better man. That’s why this is the ideal time to take your image seriously.
Right now, you all are starting off relatively from the same point. You probably have some formal education but limited work experience. You have roughly the same amount of income and the same set of material goods. If you’re starting from the same place, what’s an easy way to put yourself ahead of the competition, both professionally and personally?
Dressing well.
Let’s take two young men applying for a job. Both arrive precisely on time for their interview. Both have the same educational background, both with the same work experience, and both from the same upbringing. One young man walks in wearing an oversized button-down, sneakers, and jeans. He believes his work will speak for itself.
The other man walks in wearing a well-fitting suit; his hair combed perfectly in a style that works well for his face. His shoes are polished. He sits down feeling confident that he looks good and this confidence radiates throughout his interview.
We know who got the job.
You can look at this in a romantic context as well. Take the same two men with the same background, same race, height, etc. and put them on a dating site or app. One is dressed well, and the other is not. Who do you think gets more responses to their profile?
If she isn’t physically attracted to you, she is far less likely to be open to a conversation with you, where you can highlight your personality and your accomplishment.
“But I’m a great guy!” Cool. If you don’t even have the opportunity to show her, it doesn’t matter. We all make snap judgments. It’s not her fault. Your appearance is the foot in the door to a meaningful conversation and real attraction building.
The way you look on the outside determines how others perceive you on the inside. It even translates to how you perceive yourself. This might not seem fair, but it’s just the way it is, rooted in long-standing biology. As a society, we have always had unseen biological forces driving what we find attractive.
The smart man knows this and uses it to his advantage. He plays the game, knowing it will take him farther in life. Play the game, and you will be rewarded.
When you dress well and take care of your appearance, people will associate positive attributes to you. This is known as the halo effect. The halo effect is the tendency for an impression created in one area to influence opinion in another area. Things like intelligence, leadership, dominance, financial security, etc. will be linked to your personality, just by appearing to be a man with those qualities.
So you can see why this is important now, but I want to take it a step further. I want you to think about how this can affect your life, not just in your twenties, but further down the road as well.
I believe your twenties are the decade where the majority of your growth and formation happens. You’re figuring out who you are and how to interact with the world. You’re forming relationships that will dictate where you wind up in for the rest of your life: Who you’re going to marry, who you’re going to work for, who you’re going to become. The way you present yourself now is going to affect those relationships more than you know.
Now is the time to get your image dialed in. Look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself: is this who I want to be? Is this how I want to appear to others?
Think about the man you want to become. Dive deep into the details. Picture your future self the way you want to appear. What are you wearing? What type of shoes do you have on? How is your hair styled? What do you smell like?
Get as detailed as you can and lock this image into your head. Write it down.
This mental picture is just as crucial as visualizing your dream job, your ideal wife, or your future home. This is who you want others to see you as and what you should be working towards. Make small changes that bring you closer to this ideal image. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but once you internalize this style, it will become a part of you.
Let’s say you’re not really sure about your personal sense of style. I understand that. A lot of guys tell me they just don’t know what their style is yet. We all have our ideal image of ourselves inside of us. It just takes some cultivating to get it out.
Here’s a way to get a sense of your own personal style…
I want you to find three to five “style icons”. These are men who’s appearance resonates with you for whatever reason. These could be guys in the same industry as you, celebrates, mentors, or just a random guy on Instagram.
Once you identify your style icons, I want you to pick out a few aspects of each one that you like. Write them down.
Maybe for guy #1 you like his vintage clothing and his hairstyle. For guy #2 you admire his gym attire and athletic shoe selection. Keep going down the list and do this for each of your icons. You will start to pick out common themes between these men that you like. Now you have a base for your personal style that you can work towards. Soon you’ll understand more of what you like and what you don’t and add your own personal touches. This is your personal style.
I implore you not to be lazy with your image. Understand that now is the time to invest in this stuff and it can pay off dividends in the long run.
Your ideal job might slip through your fingers. Your perfect woman may not give you the time of day, and you may never realize your true level of confidence because you never dress in a way that makes you feel good about yourself.
If you want the most out of life, I encourage you to look the part.
If you take a little time to invest in your image now, it will pay you back tenfold now and for the rest of your life.
Much love,
Patrick
Guest writer click HERE for Patrick's website.
