Have you ever wondered where all the men from the generations before you have gone? When I say gone the reference is to the interaction between the generations. Maybe, though, you are one of those people who despises anything enriched by the aging of time, developed by the unraveling of history, and is experiencing the last chapters of their life.

Man sitting on a bench looking at the horizon of dunes.

Seriously, though, why does it seem that the disconnection in American culture between generations is so strong? Why do we deport the elderly off to the sanitary prisons that cost society more than the benefit they bring? Is it because of convenience? Is there an unseen emotional division between generations that is creating this deportation? I have a couple of friends from India who have informed me that their culture is quite the opposite from what I have come to know as normal. The generations in India ideally grow up and stick together over the years. Now I am not saying that this is always ideal, but I do find it interesting.

I just know for myself that I have had little to no interaction with anyone over the age of sixty or seventy on a consistent basis ever. My grandpa on my dad's side died way before I was born and my grandpa on my mom's side had like a million grandchildren, so I never felt a close connection or honestly anything beyond a basic social interaction with him. I just thought this was important for you to know so you can understand some of my perspectives.

Something that I did not realize until as of recently is that statistically, elderly men are prone to loneliness, depression, and other life-altering struggles outside of physical health. If you are savvy with the interwebs on any level, Google it. Here are a couple of things from the world of the web I thought would be a good start for this context.

"About six million people are affected by late-life depression, but only 10% ever receive treatment. (Brown University Long Term Care Quarterly, 1997)" {Source}

This is a great article on the topic of old men if you have time.

Here is a study that is a bit dense but has some interesting data.

"Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are fools." - George Chapman

I feel torn on this topic. As a later twenties male who takes pride in being independent, I still want support and input in life. Alas, I want help but don't want to ask for it all the time, so the dichotomy continues. My father has tried to on some levels to help out, but it seems that even he is not sure at times what to do. Where I have found most wisdom and input honestly, though, through the years is through books, podcasts, listening to conversations, and observing how older men live their lives.

I just wonder if modern day society has created a perfect storm in some respects. Where older males are isolated and don't have anyone to care about or help, and younger men are seeking affirmation and love but refuse to find mentors or just can't discover anyone willing.

"We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

I think Martin Luther King Jr could not have said it any better. I have been disappointed through the years by the lack of mentors and support I longed for but was not met, but there is always hope. I honestly don't know a man who would not appreciate the moral and physical support of past generations. It makes me think about the culture of sports in this day and age. I wonder if this is one of the only forms of coaching in life people get any more today.

So where have all the old men gone? Maybe they are in a deep depression, isolated after fulfilling years in a career they didn't love and now are aging away in the trap of their mancave. Maybe they are still working in a strenuous job, and they do not know how to make time for anything else other than day to day survival. Maybe they do want to care about and devote time to other people but don't know how. Maybe they just need a little prodding.

As a young man, I have pursued people who I respect. I think allowing help to come in any form without limitations, though, is a much-needed approach. I know that I have gone out and grabbed beer ever couple months with one businessman, and the next older male I look up to I might only interact with via email. If I take what I can get and not entrap these men into my expectations, I find myself walking away with more than I could have asked for.

All that to say this. I would love to see an intentional movement of men trying to bridge the gap between generations. The attempt to ask for input is always humbling but necessary in my opinion. These are a couple of ways I have reached out to men of age and found mentorship.

- Asked if we could grab a beer.
- Thought out questions that I want to know their opinion and being open to input.
- Called and asked if we could catch a bite to eat.
- Offered to be a pair of free helping hands for future projects.
- Read books of men that I found interesting.
- Observed how difficult situations are handled in the workplace.
- Asked questions. A lot of them.

So there you have it I hope this article made sense. I just am curious if a cultural shift could happen where the relationship between young and old would change. What are ways you have found mentorship and input from older generations?

I hope you take time to comment and share your thoughts.

Cheers,

\\Timothy//

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